How much can I really handle?

This is a question I asked myself not too long ago. I was feeling overwhelmed. I was having trouble seeing that proverbial light at the end of the tunnel.  Changes in teaching staff and administration, difficult students, being sick, being homesick, thoughts about the future, concern for the difficulties my students face, etc., were robbing my peace. I felt like my world was tilting. God, I really don't think I can handle one more thing. My prayer was said in agony. We all know the drowning feeling of one too many things piled on our shoulders. Thankfully, things started to look up quickly. God spoke as I quieted down and sought Him. It turns out, I can "handle" more. I know this for one main reason. God wants to carry my burdens. Trouble, trials and pain are are literally promises to Christians. But so is the constant presence and help of God, both in times of need and when things seem to be just fine. So, my peace didn't come when I decided I was strong enough to take care of my own problems, it came when I realized that "when I am weak, then I am strong." I gave my worries and my stress back to God. I can't change any thing! I have no answer to any of my problems. Peace comes when we let God be in control of everything, especially the things we can't control, but desperately try to.

Even though I was recovering from an awful stomach bug this week, I was significantly more upbeat  than I have been in a while. More deeply joyful. I had more to give to my students. I feel myself putting forth more effort in my classes, simply because I wasn't wasting all my energy on stress. Hey, I can even stay awake during my lunch break now, a significant accomplishment - I promise.

We had exam week last week. No one can really imagine how hectic such  a week really is, unless you've experienced something similar. First and second grade exams are mostly oral...it took so much time to test all our students. I also had to make up worthwhile, educational activities for the whole week for all my classes to work on while not testing, because we don't do any of our normal curriculum. Phew!! I'm glad we're back to normal school. I did have fun doing the conversation section with my 2nd graders. Most of them giggled through the whole thing. So adorable!! I also included a funny question about buses on the grammar exam for my 8th graders and enjoyed watching them look at me as they go to that question, laugh and say "Teacher!?". It was great.  The first week of this parcial went very well and I am looking forward to starting a new week tomorrow (I started this Sunday night). Now, it's Monday night and I had a great day at school today. Highlight of my day was definitely reforzamiento (reinforcement). I kept 3 of my 2nd graders after school and I had a great time tutoring them. Working with them in a small group helped me catch them up on what they haven't been doing well on in class and gave me a chance to connect individually with them. I mean...I keep the cutest ones on purpose...just kidding! They're all the cutest. :) Also, last week my 8th graders wrote letters and one of my boys, Dilson, wanted to write a letter to his Dad who lives in the US. I told him if he knew the address I would send it. He wrote the letter and asked me to proof read it for him. I began to cry as I read it. "Dad, I really miss you. We need you here at home. I want you to meet my friends and watch me play soccer." It was absolutely heartbreaking. He came to school with a big smile on his face last Wednesday and handed me a post-it note with an address on it. We grinned like fools at each other.  It's possible that no one in his family has ever sent a letter. Sending and receiving mail isn't something people do here. I'm so glad to be able to send this letter for him.

One thing that has a been a blessing to me recently is Skype. I've gotten to Skype with a number of friends and my parents recently and while it usually makes me homesick to see their faces and hear about what they're doing, I love it. Every second of it. The laughter, the serious conversations, the funny faces, the "hugs" from Patrick, did I mention the laughter?

As I write this, I'm thinking about how it's only 1.5 weeks until Thanksgiving and only 6 weeks until I come home for Christmas. 6 weeks! Where did all the time go? I'll be getting together with a bunch of other Americans to celebrate potluck style. It's going to be really fun! Also, we're hopefully going to La Ceiba for our long weekend. It on the coast....YES! Beach!! :) Just so you all know, I'm really excited about being home for Christmas this year. I didn't come home last year and that was a good experience but definitely difficult. If you live near me, I'd love to see you!! I only have 2 weeks so I won't be able to travel out of NY at all. Alright, that's all for now. I'm including a few random pictures....

I love and miss you all. Be encouraged by this verse:

"But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

~ 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

I....spend lots of time in this hammock. :)

One of my fav places in town...walk to the Mennonite store!

Scariest bridge ever!

Out for lunch with my companeras! 

We moved all the furniture in out house in one day!

When it rains all the time...you have dance parties.